An Unexamined Life

I have to say that I have always understood Socrates' quote: "an unexmained life is not worth living" to mean that if we don't find meaning in our daily existence, there is no value to our daily existence. And certainly most bloggers can attest to the merits of constant evaluation and dissection of our lives. We do it for therapy, we do it for entertainment, we do it because we think it's fun. But of course there is always that slippery slope we risk sliding down, into navel gazing and total self absorption, to the detriment of our stories, our readers, ourselves.
Which is how, after I finished patting myself on the back for my success in maintaining my new schedule, that I realized all of the work I have been doing to improve myself, has left me completely neglecting my kids. I have achieved my goals in terms of improving my own efforts at housekeeping and fitness, but meanwhile my kids are left to play by themselves (or with Daddy in the afternoons) while I clean, or workout or make dinner. Before we moved, I never cleaned the house but I was with them 8 hours a day, playing and reading and talking. I never did any exercise, but I was with my kids. Now, I clean the house a little everyday, and I get in a great workout, but my kids are alone, or in the gym daycare. I may be a better housekeeper, but I'm a worse mother. So it's back to the drawing board to try and design a new schedule that will make the best of both worlds - time to myself, time for my work, and time for my kids.

A Mother's Anthem

This song is In My Arms by Plumb. If you have children, I dare you not to get tears in your eyes listening to the lyrics. Although, the weird video here might help - I seriously couldn't find a better one in terms of hearing the song- apparently there are alot of remixes out there. Japanime is not really my thing otherwise. I've included the lyrics below, in case you just want to read them and not bother with the video.



In My Arms, Plumb

your baby blues,
so full of wonder
your curly-cues,
your contagious smile.
And as I watch, you start to grow up
all I can do,
is hold you tight
Knowing

(chorus)
Clouds will rage in
storms will race in
but you will be safe
in my arms
rains will pour down
waves will crash around
but you will be safe
in my arms.

Story books
are full of fairytales
Of king and queens
and the bluest skies
My heart is torn
just in knowing
you'll someday see
the truth from lies

chorus

Castles they might crumble
Dreams may not come true
But you are never all alone
I will always, always love you

chorus

The Post Wherin I Totally Copy Someone Else

Today is going to be De-Lurking day here at Practical Pablum. Amy over at Snarky Mommy, did this a couple weeks ago, and I loved the idea. I also have nothing else to talk about today so, here you go. I also have been strangely neglecting my presence online lately, and have turned into a lurker on all of the blogs I read as well. I feel bad about this, so if anyone is reading and wondering why I have been absent from their blog, just know I'm reading! I have just been too lazy and brain dumb to comment on anything.
So, today is your day to write something. Do you read here regularly but never comment? Do you read here all the time and often comment? Is this your first time here? Can you make a new account with another name to leave a comment and make my numbers look bigger? All of these are things to tell me. Tell me how you found my blog, what keeps you coming back, how much you love me, what you are getting your kids for the holidays (I need ideas), what you are getting me for the holidays (I love diamonds, but I also accept Starbucks gift certificates and cold hard cash), anything you want, really. Just click down below on that little comment button and share away. Pimp your blog, let me know your Twitter handle, your favorite recipe, whatever. I've got time.

Oh, and thanks for reading!!

Wednesday Weigh In

I am proud to say that I have completely kept up with the schedule I put myself on a couple weeks ago. Despite getting sick (again!) and of course not wanting to on many days, I have stayed on track with the cleaning schedule and everything else. I have only attended one of the yoga classes, but those were optional and they are at a really terrible time so that will be hit or miss at best probably. Also, when your head is full of phlegm, contorting into yoga poses is probably not the greatest idea. My goal for the coming weeks will be to try and hit a few more of these classes, as well as up my general cardio. I am aiming for at least an hour of cardio when I am at the gym, and I have managed that for a few days so far. the real test will be in a bout a wekk when I hit that really tired day and just don't want to exercise at all. We'll see how that goes - I am certainly not above giving myself a rest when I really need it as long as I'm not using anything as an excuse to be lazy. I haven't lost any weight so far, but my focus the past few weeks has been more on scheduling and discipline than actual weight loss. I'll be turning my focus more to that now so we'll see how that goes.

Who Taught This Kid How To Eat An Apple?

Isabelle asked for an apple today as a snack. She refused to let me slice it up, or even cut it in halves. After her first big bite, I saw she could handle it ok, and let her at it. 10 minutes later I was handed this:




She ate it from the top down - core and all. I felt simultaneously impressed and sad that my lack of attention led to my daughter eating the gross crunchy core. She didn't seem to mind though; when I related the story to my husband she chimed in with "I like the core!"

unrelated:
Izzy sings Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

At Least We Always Have Confetti For Parties

Isabelle has always liked tearing paper. Ever since she was big enough to get her hands on it, she has been shredding paper into tiny pieces - books, kleenex, anything she can rip, she will rip. And while it is annoying and destructive, I have always assumed she will grow out of it. She knows she is not supposed to tear pages out of books, and she is no longer allowed to have any paper in her room during nap times because it will always end up shredded. But I am beginning to wonder at what point do I start to worry that this habit has become a compulsion? Because she will literally rip ANYTHING if she is left alone with it she will rip it. She knows she is not supposed to, she will tell me that she won't rip anything, but then very next time she has some paper it is ripped. And of course, she is only three, so I'm not all freaked out or anything, but I'm beginning to get a little more concerned about it bcause she has started destroying all her art projects. She comes home from school so proud of her drawings and asks me to hang them on the wall in her room. And as long as she had books or other stuff in there they were fine. But now that I have taken all the books out of her room, she is taking down the art and tearing it up. Is she just sick of the pictures, or can she really not help herself? I certainly have not gone so far as to be worried about OCD or anything (if anyone has that it's Jack anyway), but how long should I just live with the issue before it really needs to be addressed? She doesn't really do anything else she knows she isn't supposed to do, but she will tear paper up in a second. I hope she grows out of this soon because keeping every type of paper away from her all the time is not realistic, and man I am sick of picking up scraps of paper everywhere.

NaBlah Blah Blah

I would just like to say that some of the bloggers I read who are participating in this whole write every day for month are hosing me. Writing beautiful, long, funny, meaningful, long, entries everyday that are, did I mention, long? And I'm here like, doop de doo, here's my five sentences for the day, off to better things, tra la. Not that it is a competition of course, but jeez am I losing. And shit, I can't even think of fifth sentence for this entry.



Ha ha, I totally snuck it in on you cause that last sentence about not thinking up a fifth sentence? WAS the fifth sentence! Suh NEAK eee!! And now I'm up to nine. Ten. Hoo, boy, I could do this all day.

Saturday Say What

Izzy: "where's my sticker?"
me: "I don't know"
Izzy: "I guess I'll just have to live without it."

me (to Jack): "do you want to be called JJ or JP?"
Izzy: "I wanna be called a princess."

inspecting the remaining snacks in the box after I gave her a small bowl: "Is there a lot in there? I probably going to need some more."

tying a ribbon around my waist: "this is for you to wear. now you can leave." where am I going? "Go to your new family."

after she sang me a new song, me: "did you learn that at school?"
Izzy:" Not yet."

wow. She's funny AND psychic.

How To Tell If Your Neighbor Is Maybe A Bit Of A Douche

This is the corner of our yard and our neighbor's yard. notice the location of the tree IN THEIR YARD:



now notice the careful delineation of leaves:

Because God forbid you rake even the slightest inch of your neighbor's yard even though all the leaves blew over there. I realize that the wind blowing his leaves into our yard is just how it works and all, but seeing as the whole area is like 10 feet wide, I think if the situation had been reversed and I was out bagging leaves, I would probably have done the whole pile. Not only to make it neat and tidy, but also to be helpful. Of course I also don't violently shove my son out of the way when he comes to the door to see trick or treaters. So maybe it's just me.

Ideology

A blogger I truly admire wrote a whlie back about how dissapointing it was when her 4 year old son one day picked up a stick to use as a sword. A true pacifist, she doesn't squish bugs, eat meat, or condone violence of any sort - even pretend. This is not a belief I share - I think kids will be kids with hitting as a part of that, and so I try to prepare them to deal with aggression (an especialy important lesson when you ahve siblings that are close in age and liable to smack you at any time). But I admire her resolve and the strength of her convictions. And I wonder if we wouldn't all be better off being a bit more like that. I am trying to prepare my children for the realities in the world and the truth about the ugly side of human nature. She is trying to protect her children aginst the bad as long as she can, with the hopes of possibly changing those realities. Who is right? The cynic in me just feels like her children are going to experience such heartache and dissapointment when they are finally faced with the unfairness of the way the world sometimes works, which is why I try to teach my children not to strike the first blow, but to defend themselves if necessary. But if more people taught their children such care for all living beings, perhaps we wouldn't have the need to defend ourselves. We could settle our differences peacefully if no one believed in aggression. What do we owe our children? To teach them the way the world unfortunately works, or to inspire them to change it? I say both. Believing everyone can be altruistic and gentle is hiding your head in the sand. There are, and always will be, people who are in it only for themselves - we are animals after all and that is part of surviving. But we can aspire to be better- that is part of being human. We can seek to improve ourselves and out society. Teach your children to be patient and gentle, to constantly work to make their lives and their world a better place. But prepare them to encounter those who won't be gentle and understanding; who won't want to compromise, but will only seek domination and power. The people who delight in the subjugation or pain of others. Because ignoring the fact that those people exist, even in an innocent attempt to shield your children, is doing them an injustice. Which is it's own kind of violence.

American Dream

As the debate rages about healthcare and the economy and partisan politics and people with differing opinions choose to shout insults at each other rather than listeing and compromising, I try to stay out of it (yesterday's post notwithstanding). I have my beliefs, and I choose to mainly keep them to myself. It doesn't matter to me what you think- I don't need to change anyone's mind over to my way of thinking, and I don't want anyone arguing and trying to change mine. And there needs to be more of this. Sit back, stop telling everyone what they chould be doing and go about your life. When faced with an obstacle, move it change it or go around. YOURSELF. Don't wait for a comittee to do it. If people stop concentrating on the problem and why it is all someone else's fault for not think A or doing B, and just go about their lives with the intent of improving what they can personally improve, things will work out. Obviously there will be issues that need a group consensus and effort, but large groups banding together and ganging up on each other move slowly and get nowhere. The individual spirit is indestructible, and it will flourish and conquer all if left undisturbed. It does not need regulation and it does not need the permission of beauracracy. All it needs is the opportunity and the room to fly.

ps: To all of the veterans, those currently serving and their loved ones: thank you SO MUCH for your sacrifice. You keep us free to fly

Open letter to all politicians

The role of Public servant should preclude you from only working to advance your self interests. You politicians are WAY too converned with your own agendas and your own power (or those of your parties) than with actually helping your constituents. The people you were elected to serve. I am so sick of empty campaign promises and media manipulation. Drop the rhetoric, lose the spin. We don't need positioning for the next election (or the next or the next), we need honest discussion and changes brought about NOW. You are there to do a job, and that job is just to ensure you stay in that position as long as possible - so get off your power tripping high horses and fucking DO SOMETHING. This is not about achieving or maintaining superiority; the parties' majorities will always cycle back and forth. no one is winning in the long run, so stop ignoring the real issues while you bicker over authority. Because we are ALL losing. you live in this country too, and while you try as hard as possble to place yourself there, you are not above the rest of us. the rules do and should apply to everyone. You were elected not to RULE us, but to SERVE us. And you ar eonly serving yourselves. Politics is about grasping onto power for the few, government is about attaining a better way of life for everyone. You have chosen wrong. If I am expected to work hard and follow rules and pay taxes to support the infrastructure of this country as well and those who cannot (or do not), then I expect you to work even harder to improve the conditions in which I do so (and that does not mean watching me like a hawk and dictate how I live my life). You VOLUNTEERED to do this and we chose you because we thought you actually would. You are failing.

No Ifs Ma'ams Or Buts

I have to confess I don't get the whole Ma'am issue. Yes, I understand when women complain about being called ma'am bceause oh dear god they certainly aren't old enough to be a ma'am they were just in high school oh gosh, was it really fifteen years ago, but I'm still young and vital and can not POSSIBLY BE A MA'AM yet never mind those children behind me. Blah blah blah whiny whiny. What is your problem? Would you really rather be called Miss? because honestly, I find that a bit condescending. one step up from "boy" without all the nasty racial/slavery connotations. But maybe I just know what it feels like to be hit with that at a crucial age or something. The first time I was called ma'am I was 21 years old - and let me tell you, at 22 I was asked if I was old to enough to be in a bar WHILE WORKING THERE, so I'm pretty sure I wasn't looking all old and ma'am age. I was just pleased to be treated with respect. I would rather be called ma'am that "hey you" or "lady" anyday. And I'm sorry, but if I have to get your attention and I don't know you, I'm going to call you ma'am. Not because you look old, but because it is polite. Unless you are a man, in which case I will call you dude*, because that is how I roll.



*ok, fine. you caught me. If you are a man I will call you sir. Because I am genteel. Unless you are a jerk in which case I will totally key your car.

The Post In Which My Baby Son Looks Like John Goodman

This is Jack at two or three months old:

Does he not look like a costume in which a grown man has his face through a cut out with pillows and a stuffed baby body attached? I thought it was so super adorable at the time, but now it is just bizarre. ok. I still think it's cute, but definitely odd.

here is he now, lest you think he never outgrew that weirdness, Handsome, no?

Saturday Say What

me: "Izzy, why did you leave Sophie all alone in the basement?" Izzy: "well, she wasn't crying, so I left her."

my husband: "who wants to go brush teeth?" Izzy: " NOBODY!"

playing in a large tupperware toy bin, kicking the side near the baby: "Sophie likes it when I kick the bucket."

after I pointed out the line of bruises up her shin: "they came back! But this time they're on the other leg."

to the lions at the zoo who were literally only 5 feet away and were eyeing the baby in my arms quite lustily: "no lions! you can't eat my sister!"

with no context: "Can I sit in this basket for 2 hours?"

um, sure, little girl, go ahead.

If you want to hear about how my bathroom has become a death trap. go here